Balancing belonging and relationships: contact dynamics in permanent foster care after infant relinquishment

This article presents a Dutch study on ongoing contact between children and birth parents in permanent foster care as an alternative to the voluntary relinquishment of infants for adoption. The Netherlands lack a legal basis for open adoption, and permanent foster care was introduced as alternative to mitigate the negative impacts of closed adoption. We investigated how birth mothers, children, and permanent foster parents experience and navigate contact with each other, highlighting issues that need attention in contact agreements to ensure quality of contact, communication and support. Multiple perspectives were incorporated through interviews with children, birth mothers, foster parents, and professionals. Three substantive themes emerged that require attention in contact arrangements and support: relational positioning and role negotiation, multiple belonging, and guidance of contact. Both birth and foster parents seek to define and affirm their relationship with the child, while navigating their roles relative to each other. For children, relational positioning revolves around questions of dual belonging, such as ‘What are my roots?’ and ‘Where is my home?’. Ongoing contact presents inherent challenges, and the interviews underscored the need for structured guidance to maintain positive contact involving the child, birth mother, and foster parents. Notably, the guidance of birth parents requires particular attention. The study’s findings can enhance professionals’ understanding of the challenges and opportunities of ongoing contact between children and birth parents, enabling them to provide adequate support.