Two Plus One Still Equals Two: Inclusion and Exclusion in the Japanese Family

This article explores family dynamics in Japan as reflected in Japanese sleeping practices. sleep, in a Japanese context, is often associated with co-sleeping (soine) and feelings of skinship [intimacy through touch]. Ethnographic research, undertaken in 2005 in North-East and Western Honshu, indicates that there is an identity logic in certain sleeping practices that incorporates a ‘purposeful tension’, while in others, there is a relational logic in which skinship is manifest. In this article, I explore these states of relationality through kawa no ji [sleeping with the child in between parents]. Empirical evidence derived from participant-observations and interviews provides the basis for understanding two relational states in soine: exclusive and inclusive family relations. in exclusive relations, kawa no ji is used to separate or alienate a member (or members) of a family, while inclusive relations establish a connection and all-encompassing space ‘between the family’ that provide possibilities for skinship. This article offers an understanding of how the space is inhabited ‘between the family’, and how this constrains or allows intimacy.